Nipples can break off but you just gotta keep going….
The Moab Red Hot has never really been kind to me and this
year proved to be no different. I knew heading in that my training was well off
of what it needed to be. With all this snow and cold and crappy air, I haven’t
been able to get the long runs in like years past. As frustrating as that was I
was really hoping that almost a year of Pilates and getting my ass handed to me
at Bomber Athlete for the last few months could help fill in the void. In the
end it became apparent as ever that nothing can replace running.
Heading down to Moab I was a little nervous just from the
sheer numbers- 800 runners. It has almost doubled since last year and I was a
little concerned how that would all work out. In hindsight I now know that it
does no good to worry about something I can’t control and the real concern
should have been with my training. Last year I ran 6:17 and was disappointed
when I finished knowing I should go under 6 hours. Even though that was the
goal this year I started to realize that may not happen either. I was however
really looking forward to all of the HUMR group that would be down there to
help kick off 2013. The weather was fantastic the air was clear and the trails
were red.
A few HUMR’s at the start.- Photo: Jo Agnew
After a nice dinner at Pasta Jay’s it was back to the hotel
to get things ready for Saturday morning. I decided to take 3 flasks and one
handheld with me for the race. I filled 3 small flasks with 2-3 ounces EFS
Liquid Shot and one heaping scoop of EFS electrolyte drink topped off with
water. I threw them in my UltrAspire Spry vest with my iPod and took along an
isomeric pocket handheld filled with plain water. My plan was to take small
nips off the flasks- each lasting 2 hours a piece. The handheld could easily
get me to each aid station and after that it was up to me. As we gathered at
the start it was ripe with HUMR’s. It was obvious we stole the show
(wink-wink). Between the HUMR group and the HUMR Ultra Team it made me feel a
little more at ease knowing I would see many of them over the course of the
next 30+ miles. When the RD said GO- we all took off. I tried to settle in a
bit and plot a plan for the first hill- would I power walk or run- decision, a
little of both. Once we hit the small little climb I settled in to a comfortable
pace but for whatever reason had a hard time getting my breathing under
control. I think the problem was the air was too clean. For the first mile or
so I seen a few HUMR’s up ahead and a few started passing. Kelly was nice
enough to pat me on the buttocks as he passed and soon after I got a HUMR
heckle from behind- here comes Ryan, Bryce and Bj. As they caught me I decided
to match their stride for a bit and go with them. I knew it wouldn’t last long
since these 3 are so gazelle like in their efforts. Once they left I ran with
Kelly for a bit until we hit the first aid station. Leaving that I still felt
pretty good and looking forward to the next section. Unfortunately this is
where I had my first problem of the day- BROKEN NIPPLE. As I stopped to tie my
shoe I set my handheld down for a moment- well it rolled off the rock and BOOM-
my nipple just popped clean off! My handheld slowly drained and my heart sunk
just a little. Here I was at mile 9 and I have a broken nipple and no water. I
stood up, threw on my big boy pants, put my head down and trudged forward. When
I pulled into the next aid station the 2 girls asked if I needed anything. I
replied- “my nipple broke.” They both looked up with a snap of the neck with
jaws open……they responded- “we have water and Heed.” Once I set them straight
they laughed but didn’t have anything for me to use to carry water in. I
guzzled as much as I could and headed off. Over the next few miles I panicked a
bit more and tried to think of what else I could do. You see, I need water. I love it. I am what
you would call a heavy sweater- not the Christmas type either. As I got closer
to the next aid station I saw a white truck off in the distance and had a
little calmness come over me. It was Lane Farka, Pam and Steve. They had driven
out to cheer and drop off water at the aid stations. As I approached I saw
Jared and was a little concerned. I asked if they had anything to carry water
and Forrest had an extra handheld there that I was able to use- I was saved!
Lane filled it up and as I was heading out Jared joined me. He was feeling very
well but he is a tough SOB and kept on truckin. I ran with Jared for a bit when
Jim caught up then Shawn. The next bit was the climb up the slick rock around
mile 20 and I knew I wouldn’t see them all again until the finish.
Jared pulling me along. Photo by: Joel Schenk
The rest of the race was uneventful except for the few times
I stopped to lay down and stretch. As the mile slowly went by I knew a sub 6
was out and a chance of a slower time than the year before was inevitable. The
last few miles were tough-mentally. So many things went through my head and I
was just disappointed. As I approached the finish line I heard a lot of cheers
which felt amazing but I just wanted to be done. 6:40- YIKES! 23 minutes slower
than 2012, not exactly how I wanted to start the year.
This next segment is stolen from my friend and fellow HUMR
Harrison “Clean & Jerk” Fluman.
Things I learned from Moab:
- It’s only when I forget to bring baby wipes I need them.
- Losing a nipple can cripple.
- Race photos are not like glamour shots.
- Some people do run with Yamaka’s.
- Just because you went to Penn State doesn’t mean you like to tickle.
- Sitting in pee-pee is not for mee.
Trottin to the finish. Photo by: Cammie Burlison
At the end of the day though, I was pumped for so many
people. The HUMR’s truly represented. Ryan Lauck had an amazing performance,
Misty, Debbie and Ms. Dennis ran their longest race, Jared rallied big time to
finish strong, Jon running his first race in some time since he has been
homeless and there are so many more. The one thing they all did was finish with
a smile. Once again I left a race thankful, thankful to have so many amazing
people in my life. Race season is here- I guess I better start showing up.
