Well, it has been a rough few weeks since the DNF in Montana. I took a few days off to get feeling better physically but mentally isn't doing as well. I have been training and getting some good running in as well as race directing. Last week I ran the Skyline Marathon. It is a great first year trail race on some nice singletrack. I was hoping that the race would get my engine sparking again but still nothing. The run went well and I actually felt pretty decent. I tried to push in a few spots I normally would have taken it easy on. I thought this would help determine the rest of my year for racing. The plan was to run the GTR 50 then hit the Bear 100 for some redemption and get that taste of DNF out of my mouth, then hit the Mtn View Trail 1/2 and finish with the inagural 100k on Antelope Island. After the race last weekend I came away with= "I am done for the year- racing/races." Just don't have that fire that get me excited to test myself. Part of me thinks if I do the Bear (which I have wanted to do now for 3 years) and fail again then I may never get back on the horse. The Swancrest 100 really took something out of me/from me. I can't put a finger on it and I know it "happens to everyone" but damn!
So as I sit here- I am thinking of doing the GTR Trail Marathon and go from there. I really do want to run the Bear but really don't have any confidence at all. I am also hoping that getting this on paper/computer will help me deal with it better and rally a bit.
Funny thing is my wife and kids really want me to run the Bear. How crazy is that??? I am always trying to sell the races to them and it's work but not this time......man- happened in Montana or was it the Twilight Zone!?